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Episode 59: Navigating Failure





Summary:

In this episode of Weight Loss for Food-Lovers, Molly gets honest about a subject that society teaches us to avoid: Failure. Rather than seeing setbacks as a reason for self-reproach and shame, how about reframing them as an inevitable part of the journey to ultimate success? Achievement isn’t just about reaching a goal. It’s also about demonstrating resilience and grace in the face of obstacles.


Molly gets personal about the challenges she has faced over the past three years; the many times she doubted whether she would meet the lofty goals she had set (a 35-pound weight loss, new relationship with alcohol and thriving Life Coaching practice). Rather than be defined, or paralyzed, by discouraging thoughts she used her failures as an opportunity for growth. In this episode Molly shares how it’s possible to explore shortcomings honestly and with self-compassion – and why it’s so important that we do that painstaking work, which only gets easier over time.


There are concrete steps to take in the face of defeat that not only will get you back on track but will also empower greater self-acceptance and resilience in the long run. Join Molly as she shares her personal journey and the lessons she has learned – ideas that drive her Life Coaching practice and desire to introduce others to this entirely new way of thinking and feeling!


If you’d like to learn more about how to use inevitable failure as a tool for ultimate success, Molly is ready to help you explore your situation. Sign up for a free one-to-one discovery call here.


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Topics Covered

· Things are looking up – spring has sprung and a sense of hope is in the air!

· Failure isn’t something to cover up or avoid discussing. It’s a badge of honor and inevitable part of reaching any goal.

· Molly gets honest about some of her recent failures. She has much of which to be proud, but she has known more failure than success in the past three years.

· Those who are brave enough to be vulnerable about their failure are sometimes met with silence, which she sees as a lost opportunity to share, learn and grow.

· Admitting setbacks to ourselves and showing self-compassion are essential tools for growth and achievement.

· Molly has set big goals for herself:

o Permanently altering her relationship with food, which involved many attempts, failures … and then trying again.

o Letting go of her old relationship with alcohol and venturing into a universe of intentionality and moderation that was initially hard to imagine.

o Launching a Life Coaching practice – a brand new entrepreneurial venture with many obstacles and unknowns at every turn.

· Even in reaching goals and feeling firmly on the right path, there will be setbacks; challenges and failures that require self-knowledge and trust to steer you back.

· Resilience to failure is essential to reaching your ultimate goal.

· Some of the mountains Molly had to climb as an aspiring Life Coach – building her website, getting word out about her business, starting her podcast – necessarily included setbacks, frustration, an urge to throw in the towel.

· Molly shares concrete steps to embrace (and learn from) failure:

o Ask yourself honestly what went wrong – with curiosity, not self-judgment.

o Accept that it – whatever the setback – was meant to happen that way.

o Show compassion to yourself; not a self-shaming critic (which only serves to hold you back and reinforce negative behaviors that do not serve).

o Do not frame a slip as an overarching failure. It’s not an indicator of ultimate success, but rather just a reminder that human beings are flawed.

o Methodically examine and learn from mistakes.

o Use any setback as an opportunity to double down on commitment to the ultimate goal.


Key Quotes

· “Everybody experiences failure and for a lot of us in this past year maybe even more so than normal.”

· “When people avoid talking about their failures it’s a shame because we can all benefit from learning about failure.”

· “Learning how to navigate failure is an essential part of reaching your goal in the end. Anybody who has accomplished something huge will tell you that.”

· “Being good at failure – figuring out how to be resilient – is such a powerful skill to have.”

· “I was not prepared for the amount of failure that I would have to build up before I started to experience success.”

· “It’s really important to me that I share setbacks so that people don’t think, ‘Oh it’s so easy for her, her life is so perfect, she doesn’t struggle.’”

· “The difference now is that I’ve been through it, I’ve experienced failure so many times, I’ve learned so much about myself and know the benefits of staying committed to the work that I do.”

· “This is a life’s work … Sometimes we think that you just arrive at this point and no longer struggle. That’s not realistic and it’s not helpful.”

· “There will always be that competing desire for your primitive brain.”

· “As long as you continue to take action and evaluate setbacks … you’re still in the game. You are still on your way to your goal.”

· “Start to think of (failure) as exactly the way things were meant to happen.”

· “Anytime you have a setback, all it means is that you are a human being who is flawed. You are not perfect. Take some time and digest that!”

· “Reminding yourself of why you’re not giving up … is strengthening that sense of purpose and commitment. It’s making you stronger on the other side.”



Links & Resources

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