This episode of Weight Loss for Food-Lovers offers a sneak-peak into Molly’s 12-week course with a recorded lesson that’s among the most popular she has ever taught: “How To Have More Fun!”
Our primitive minds know that food and alcohol offer immediate gratification; the kind of easily accessible, short-term fun we associate with parties or vacations or celebrations. But Molly explains that “natural fun” comes from an entirely different source. It’s something that has to be identified and cultivated. This may be challenging to do at first, but it always delivers long-term satisfaction and confidence.
Molly offers up a number of strategies for developing new forms of gratification or, as she puts it, exercising our “fun muscle.” It’s important that we look at what thoughts our brains are offering about what defines fun and figure out whether there aren’t new ways to practice pleasure. Are there things we can do differently when coping with social and other situations that are focused on food/drink? What are some effective ways to head off reflexive behaviors or feelings of deprivation? Molly shares great tips and helps us learn the power of visualizing the future – the ongoing good feelings we experience when we choose healthy, positive, self-generated ways to have fun.
Updates about the launch of Molly’s next 12-week course in September can be found here.
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Molly distinguishes “natural” fun versus the kind generated by food and drink.
Food and alcohol are tricky and quickly find ways to trigger powerful feelings of pleasure and ultimately a cycle of desire.
Molly explains why we need to think about fun in a new way – as something that has to be deliberately created.
In addition to food and drink, other passive ways of enjoying fun include shopping or watching movies. They are activities refined to create easy gratification.
Decoupling the primitive brain’s drive for pleasure from happiness in the long run opens us up to something far more energizing than passive fun.
A few things that constitute natural pleasure:
The problem is that so many of us have gotten into a routine of using food and alcohol as quick ways to access pleasure.
Creating rather than consuming fun requires that we address our thoughts and redefine what it is to have fun. (Hint: Not food and drink).
Molly shares an anecdote about her resistance to attending a big birthday bash and how she shifted her thinking to make it an opportunity to explore her unconscious thoughts about it all.
Observing thoughts and moving through uncomfortable situations builds confidence and clarity and solidifies an ability to have natural fun.
The fun muscle: In order to become better at creating fun and finding fun outside of overeating and overdrinking you have to work at it and build the habit.
Ways to reorient and start exercising your “fun muscle”:
Look at the thoughts your brain is offering about what it is to have fun and figure out whether there aren’t other things to practice believing instead.
Ask yourself what you can try to do differently in social and other situations in the pursuit of fun.
Think into the future about how good it feels when you’re intentionally creating fun outside of overeating or overdrinking.
Molly explains her experience with masters’ swimming and why it has been such a source of natural fun:
She loves awakening early.
She has since babyhood felt delight and comfort in the water.
She thrives on the camaraderie.
She loves how she feels after the workout – a sense of release and re-energized, elevated mood.
The solution lies in figuring out what’s your happy place – where do you find a sense of natural fun that has nothing to do with food or alcohol?
Molly wraps up with some ideas for generating natural fun:
Moving your body.
Being in nature.
Doing something adventurous.
Trying something new.
Creating things – writing, building, art.
Learning a new skill or hobby.
Engaging/connecting with people.
When it comes to finding ways to weave fun into your life, it’s all about a curious mindset and investigating what resonates for you personally.
“When you work to eat or drink less as part of the new lifestyle you’re creating for yourself at your ideal weight, there is going to be a void there initially. That’s totally normal.”
“As human beings we’re designed to have fun. We are meant to enjoy ourselves. We are meant to experience pleasure in life.”
“It can be easy to consume fun rather than really create it.”
“Food and alcohol are a type of concentrated pleasure.”
“If you are relying on passive types of fun for all of the pleasure you’re receiving, usually there’s some kind of (negative) side effect on the other side.”
“The way to change the habit is to replace some of the concentrated pleasure that you get from food and alcohol with natural pleasure.”
“Think about the true desires of your heart … Food and alcohol are usually an artificial way of satisfying those desires.”
“It’s possible that I can enjoy myself without overeating.”
“It’s important to be fully present with yourself in what’s happening without attaching to any of the thoughts that would normally lead you to eat or drink.”
“You need to take a look at what you’re believing in order to change it.”
“Start investigating what is fun for you – what brings you joy – so you can start coming up with ideas of things you can try doing.”
“When we’re imagining we’re experiencing that natural pleasure.”
Links & Resources
Subscribe to Molly’s email list and request her free 6-Point Guide to Kickstarting Weight:
Sign-up for a free discovery call at https://www.mollyzemek.com/bookings-checkout/free-discovery-call/book
Connect with Molly